I dreamed but I was not sleeping — an event in which I can identify with Paul: ‘whether in the body or out of the body I do not know’. My dream began in the garden, but very quickly Jesus led me beside an ocean. Giant waves pounded the sandy shore, rhythmic, deafening. Cold spray blew against my face. Foam laced my eyelashes. I tasted salt.
He said, “The ocean represents great power. It spawns tempests and tsunamis and is vast and deep. But I can put all the oceans of the world into a drinking glass and hold it in My hand.”
Then we journeyed to the outer edges of the cosmos. Stars spun across the expanse, burning orbs pulsing with heat, great throbbing engines of immeasurable intense energy. A mighty power thrummed and shook my entire being. I clung to His presence, intimidated and afraid I might be swallowed up and lost in that chaotic abyss; seeing myself as smaller than a speck of dust, invisible except for being anchored in Him.
He said, “My Father breathes out stars. Birthed in the belly of His Presence, they are merely a product of His exhalation.”
I have met Him in this garden many times. Battered by the world’s impersonal brutality, His gentle acceptance calmed and strengthened me; torn and bleeding from callous words and human spite, His smile erased the pain and healed my wounds. I have walked through these paths holding His hand, gentled by His love, renewed by His voice speaking encouragement and promise. I have knelt, knees in the cool fragrant grass, cheek against His warm bare foot, gratitude filling me up and making me whole.
Today He reminded me the sweet Lamb is only one side of a great and mighty King. Although it is His kindness that draws me to repentance, I must never mistake His peaceful nature for weakness. He makes Himself accessible so that I never hesitate to approach Him, but I must not measure Him by His willingness to be small for my sake.
To do so diminishes Him in my mind. I am guilty of this. When my vision of Him becomes limited I am in danger of overestimating myself and underestimating Him; of taking Him for granted and making of Him an alternate santa or a benevolent sugar daddy. The beginning of wisdom is to know Him in the fullness of His multi-faceted character, to acknowledge His greatness and allow that image of Him to inspire such a holy reverence that I never forget His throne, surrounded by emerald rainbows, emanating thunder and lightning, where He is very high and very lifted up.
I am invited to fellowship with the wonderful Lamb of God. I am compelled by my fearful respect to worship the Great Lion of Judah. To know the Lion without the Lamb forces me to keep my distance – so aware of my puny stature that I cannot even look at His face. To know the Lamb without the Lion fosters an over familiarity where I may begin to consider myself an equal.
Lord, I ask You to give me a spirit of wisdom and revelation in the knowledge of You. I ask that the eyes of my heart be enlightened so that I can know what is the hope of Your calling, what are the riches of the glory of Your inheritance in all Your children, and what is the surpassing greatness of Your power toward us who believe…Allow me to know You in the power of Your resurrection, and in the fellowship of Your suffering…grant me the ability to know the love of Christ which surpasses knowledge, so that I may be filled up to all the fullness of God. That I might live a life worthy of the One who gave all for me.